We also received allowances. To teach us to manage our income, we had expenses
to pay. Whatever was left, we could choose to spend or save.

Our parents opened savings accounts when we were born for depositing gifts of money
we received until we were old enough to make our own decisions about what to do with monetary gifts. [Saving was their preferred, but not the only choice.]

Once we reached high school, we were given checking accounts and made responsible for specific expenses. Our parents funded the accounts annually to cover those expenses and provide discretionary funds. We were expected to live within our budgets, and to do that we had to understand the difference between needs and wants. Cost of living adjustments occurred yearly, as circumstances dictated.

When time came for college, the practice continued, and I enjoyed knowing that I had
money to take care of my needs. By contrast, many classmates had no experience in “handling money.” Whenever they needed or wanted something, they had to ask their parents for money. They missed out on opportunities to weigh options, make choices, and experience the consequences of decisions made~all invaluable lessons for emerging adults. Others, of course, seemed to have unlimited funds and, therefore, never learned about balancing budgets or planning ahead.

Learning to manage personal finances from childhood is crucial to a successful transition into adulthood. Whatever our financial situation, the more knowledge and experience we gain as we’re growing up, the better.

However we choose to do so, we must make time to teach and model healthy attitudes towards work, play, and money. Children are not born knowing how to earn, spend, and save. Instant gratification is the norm for children. Every want is a need until they learn to distinguish the difference. Let’s commit ourselves to acquiring the tools and teaching our children how to be fiscally responsible. They~and we~will be glad we did.

Somehow we learned that people work, earn wages, and spend that money to meet their needs and support their families. Growing up with a deep understanding of the difference between needs and wants is fundamental to learning money management. When we truly understand that difference, figuring out how to live within a budget and how to save money makes sense. Staying on budget and saving take diligence, and the unexpected challenges our resolve. That’s why the sooner we begin learning, the better.

Many parents teach the importance of “an honest day’s work for an honest day’s pay,” by assigning chores and paying allowances based on the completion of those duties. In this scenario, assigning monetary value to each task makes the relationship between work accomplished and money earned clearer and reduces misunderstanding of the consequences of failing to do what’s expected.

Others believe that children, as members of the family, need to share in household chores. Assigning tasks in age appropriate ways allows children to learn life skills and teaches responsibility, teamwork, and cooperation. “Many hands make light~or at least lighter~work,” and we all need to contribute to the process.

Staying upbeat and making a game of the chores takes the sting out of doing what everyone would likely rather not have to do. We’ve all heard the expression “whistle while you work.” Try that. Hum. Sing. Skip from task to task.

Some families set a timer and everyone focuses on accomplishing tasks as quickly as possible. When time’s up, everyone stops working and moves on to something else~perhaps a solitary pleasure or a family activity. One person may curl up with a book. Another may prefer a walk around the block. Actually the entire family could gather round and listen as someone reads aloud, then everyone could head outdoors and explore the neighborhood. Working and playing together are natural partners.

Affliction and blessings are polar opposites. Or are they? Often unexpected misfortunes bring unexpected comfort. I am reminded of a series of articles Pulitzer Prize-winning author Rick Bragg wrote for Southern Living following the devastating tornado that roared through Tuscaloosa, Alabama, 27 April 2011. From What Stands in a Storm: When the Winds Died Down through Faith, Food, and Fellowship, the Alabama native writes of the devastation of “a gothic monster off the scale of our experience and even our imagination…killing hundreds, hurting thousands, even affecting, perhaps forever, how we look at the sky.”

In Faith, Food, and Fellowship, he shares his experiences of how survivors harnessed their faith, food, and fellowship to help each other. Families, friends, neighbors, even strangers, rallied to do whatever needed doing~from comforting, feeding, and housing to clearing debris and repairing roofs “because it looked like rain.” In his words, “there was no end to this generosity.”

I am reminded of the World War II reminder to Londoners living with the Blitz: Stay Calm. Carry On. Staying calm and carrying on, doing what needed to be done in the aftermath of death, injury, and massive destruction could not undo the affliction. Yet that coming together demonstrates how closely tied tragedy and blessings often are.

Among the oft repeated maxims I heard growing up, one stands out: “It could be worse.” I’ve learned that’s always true, whatever the problem. As we embark on a new year, let’s resolve to keep calm, carry on, and no matter how beset with problems we become, to acknowledge we’re fortunate even in our misfortunes. Likewise we must remember to be a blessing to the afflicted.

We wish you a new year filled with peace and beauty, joy and love.

Poll family and friends to find out what each considers the worst and the best happening of the past year. In the case of the worst, talk about what enabled the person to get
through it. Nothing is ever as bad as it could be. Knowing that is comforting. Certainly won’t undo the misfortune. Just puts the situation in perspective. Armed with this knowledge, going forward we’re better able to keep calm and carry on, as the Brits say.

What was the best event of the year? Retelling that makes the happy memory come alive and sets the stage for an optimistic beginning to the new year.

Recalling the low and high points of the year past, then looking ahead to anticipated pleasures in the coming year strengthens communication skills and provides insights. Starting a journal, complete with pictures, where our memories and our dreams are recorded and preserved creates a tradition of sharing and a family history to be treasured.

To avoid hemispheric egocentrism, I could use universal terms: December Solstice, March Equinox, June Solstice, September Equinox that do not match these events to seasons. I could. To be inclusive, I should. Yet I simply cannot “go there.” It feels too strange. For me, the solstice that occurs in December is a winter event; the darkest day of the year and winter are as inseparable as the longest day of the year and summer. They just go together.

In December, cultural and religious celebrations abound, each bringing light into the darkness. Hanukkah, an eight day Jewish holiday also known as the Festival of Lights, commemorates the rededication of the Temple in Jerusalem in 165BCE. The miracle of that first Hanukkah was that even though only a one-day supply of olive oil could be found for the rededication, the oil burned for eight days.

Christians refer to Jesus as the light of the world, and what a powerful image that is with the world bathed in the darkness of winter. Seasonal decorations emphasize light, creating magical landscapes and piercing darkness, lifting spirits and warming hearts. Fireplaces crackle. Candles glow.

Kwanzaa, an African- American and Pan-African cultural holiday that runs from 26 December through 1 January, also involves the lighting of candles, each representing one of seven principles that form the basis of the celebration: unity, self-determination, collective work and responsibility, cooperative economics, purpose, creativity, and faith.

Whatever your holiday traditions, embrace and delight in the opportunity to celebrate the season with those you hold nearest and dearest. We at Playworks send our best wishes and goodwill to all.

Here’s a fave at our house:

Mema’s Cookies
From the Ackerman Outpost Kitchen ~ December 2008

1 tsp vanilla 1 egg
½ C butter 3 ~ 1 ounce squares unsweetened chocolate (melted)
1 ¾ C flour ½ tsp baking soda
1/8 tsp salt ¾ C fresh sour cream
1 C brown sugar
1 can milk chocolate frosting
Candy sprinkles

Cream butter & sugar until fluffy. Beat in egg and vanilla. Stir in melted chocolate. In a separate bowl, sift dry ingredients together. Add dry ingredients to chocolate mixture alternating with sour cream. Mix well. Drop from teaspoon* on lightly greased cookie sheet (or, line cookie sheet with parchment paper). Bake at 350° for 11 – 14 minutes. Frost with canned frosting and decorate with little sprinkles. Makes 3 to 4 dozen cookies, depending on the teaspoon!

*I use the small scoop from Williams-Sonoma (it looks like an ice cream scoop and the scoop is the size of a melon ball).

Mema was my grandmother (my father’s mom). Her real name was Ann Bond. She brought “Mema’s Cookies” each Christmas! Enjoy! ~ peg ackerman

Instead of semi-sweet, substitute milk chocolate or dark chocolate. White chocolate goes well with macadamia nuts. I’ve used butterscotch and peanut butter chips at different times, but what I do most often is omit the chips altogether and use dried fruit. Favorites have been raisins, cranberries, cherries, and diced apricots.The key to success is to rehydrate the dried fruit before adding to the other ingredients. To do this, put the fruit in a heat resistant bowl and cover with boiling water. After 15 minutes or so, drain off the liquid and stir the fruit into the dough. Skipping this step results in too little liquid in the dough and dry cookies. Dried fruit draws moisture from the other ingredients. You definitely do not want to go there.

When I visit my mother, I use her old big green Tupperware mixing bowl and make two or more batches at one time. These cookies freeze beautifully, and absolutely everyone looks forward to raiding her freezer. When unexpected guests arrive, we take a bag of cookies from the freezer, arrange them on a plate, and by the time, the coffee brews or the tea steeps, the cookies are ready to eat. That’s about as simple and delightful a way to spend time with family and friends as I can imagine.

The basis for this recipe came from a word search puzzle my mother worked, then saved for us to try. We’ve adapted the original to suit ourselves and recommend it without reservation. Everyone~and I mean everyone~who has eaten one of these cookies has liked it. One is rarely enough. If you like to bake, by all means bake batches and give as gifts. Otherwise create a kit and invite the recipients to bake their own.

Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookie Mix

1 1/3 cups rolled oats
1/2 cup packed brown sugar
1/2 cup granulated cane sugar
1/2 cup chopped pecans
1 cup semisweet chocolate chips
1 1/3 cups unbleached all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon sea salt

In a one-quart canning jar, layer ingredients in the order listed, pressing each layer firmly before adding the next ingredient. Tightly screw lid on jar and use festive ribbon to attach a gift tag with these instructions:

To prepare cookies, preheat oven at 350 degrees.
Grease cookie sheets or line with parchment paper for easier clean up.
In a mixing bowl, mix 1/2 cup melted butter
1 egg
1 teaspoon pure vanilla
Add contents of jar and stir to blend. [Chilling dough makes forming it into balls easier.]
Shape dough into walnut-sized balls, place two inches apart on prepared cookie sheets,
and bake 11 to 13 minutes.
Allow cookies to cool on pan until firm, then transfer to wire rack to cool completely
before storing.
Yields 30+ cookies.

Unless you’re making gift jars of cookie mix, you’ll find this recipe invites “playing around” with the ingredients. For more ideas, check out our extra blog entry on Thursday, 8 December 2011, then assemble your ingredients and fill your home with the irresistible fragrance of freshly baking cookies.

Easy Party Favor Idea ~ Christmas Ornament

Cut out stars from card stock.
Punch a hole in the top.
Lay out stars on wax paper.
Thin some white glue slightly and cover star.
Sprinkle star with fine silver glitter.
Let dry.
Flip stars over, apply glue and glitter and let dry.
Slip a piece of red ribbon or maybe some baker’s twine through the hole and tie.
Put in cello bag and tie with ribbon.
Nice little something for all those who stop by during the holidays.

I gave these out one Thanksgiving and they were a hit! And, it is easy enough that kids can help.

Having carved pumpkins and turkeys, we’re now on the cusp of December and its special celebrations~Hanukkah, Christmas, and Kwanzaa. Whatever holidays we observe, our loved ones~relatives, friends who’ve become family or a mix of both~are key to creating cherished memories as unique as each person involved. How we celebrate holidays varies from family to family and reflects our culture, regional traditions, religious beliefs and practices, personal preference, and socio-economic status. Over time, we make adjustments, eliminating some traditions, re-creating others, and creating new ones as circumstances dictate, and that’s appropriate, even desirable, if we want to keep the joy in our celebrations.

As we embark upon another holiday season in what has been a challenging year for many, let’s simplify and focus on living in the present, being present for those we love, sharing simple pleasures, and treating ourselves and others with compassion. These may very well be the best gifts we can give or receive. Simply being with those we cherish, spending time sharing fond memories while creating new ones could be the best of the best.

Speaking of sharing and creating memories, we welcome you to share one of your family’s favorite holiday recipes, crafts, or special traditions as well as your ideas on how to not only “keep calm and carry on” but also actually delight in the holiday season. Please e-mail christina@playworks.net, and we’ll share your post with all our readers.